Can I solve your problems please?

My friend, brother, colleague, Andrew and I have just been chatting at our desks about a friend of his that has been asking him some stuff (via ICQ) about relationships. This is the deal: This friend and his girlfriend go to a church that has taken a very strong stance on dating/relationships etc. "Dating must happen in a group context, and you should never be alone together!" We know the drill. I agree that some of these things can be helpful, but it just got me thinking about how we/I so often approach problems in our lives. The easiest thing for me is to try an implement a system that will enable me to accomplish dot dot dot.

Young man: "Pastor, me and my girl friend have been messing around, what should we do?"
Pastor: "Son, from now on you must never ever be alone together, and err, don't kiss each other that way!"

I am sure I have dumped this advise on some poor kid back in my Youth ministry days, and although it has some value, it is however pointing people to principles and structures rather than to Christ. I have also learned from experience, that if the only thing I am relying on is a principle or structure, I WILL cross/break it in a matter of time. What I need is HEART, His heart! No principle or method can give me this other than a realtime, honest, passionate relationship with God. A good dose of the Fear of God would also be very helpful!